Sunday, January 16, 2011

The Good, The Bad, and The Cool

Since the dawn of the Calling All Cool Moms blog (which started on a whim after coming up with the idea in the shower-- the only place I am ever truly ALONE, and therefore where I do most of my thinking), I have been asked: What is a Cool Mom?  And while I'm sure every mom is Cool in her own way, I would like to present to you a few qualities that we Cool Mamas must possess:

1) Staying calm (and even witty) in times of crisis/embarrassment.  I will never forget the day I decided to venture out of the house with my 4 month-old-- in the snow-- to enjoy a cup of coffee at Panera.  While removing the baby, diaper bag, purse, and stroller (I deserved a medal already) out of the car, the stroller rolled away from me.  And landed, still folded up, against an Escalade.  Whereupon the woman got out of her car (in a pencil skirt and heels-- yes, my post-baby body was jealous, but really?  My post-baby brain urged my kid to spit up on her.), looked at me with horror and disgust, and said: "Did that THING just hit my car?"  (Seriously?  Her car would have considered the stroller a tiny speed bump, and she's worried that my FULLY PADDED baby carrier dented her school-bus-sized vehicle?)  I stuck my face out between the baby and all its paraphranalia and said: "Dont worry, I have insurance... and a HORMONAL IMBALANCE!!"
2) Roll with the (preschool) punches.  Ah yes, once your kiddo hits school, it's time to show the other mamas how Cool you are.  However, forgetting that your child is Snack Leader, that he needs an empty cereal box for a project, or needed to wear a green shirt on "green day"?  Not so Cool.  (Yet that's how I roll.  I know, but cut me some slack.  I'm the only working mom in the class.  And when I tell my kid I'm sorry that I keep forgetting these things?  He says, "Mommy, don't be sorry.  I'm not.  It's no big deal."  And that?  Is One Cool Kiddo.)  
I know one Cool Mom whose son was asked by his teacher to name 2 of his mother's favorite things, presumably for a Christmas gift.  His answer?  Miller Lite and Wine.  And when the teacher phoned home to make sure "everything was okay?"  This Cool Mom replied, "Absolutely!  He even remembered which brand I like!"
3) Admit defeat.  Let's be honest: sometimes your kids get the best of you.  So if you are at the park with your 3 children under age 5, and one falls off the swingset, one needs to go to the bathroom, and you're trying to nurse the baby?  Nobody expects you to be Julie Andrews (though wouldn't life be great if every time we are faced with a parenting problem, we could just break out into song with our family-- in matching jumpers-- and everything would be okay??).  It's perfectly acceptable to scream "JUST BRING ON THE LOCUSTS ALREADY!"

So go off into the world, ladies, and show 'em how Cool you are.  And if not?  Well, just belt out a few lines of "These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things."  It seemed to help that Von Trapp family.


  1. Way to give a shout out to my fav movie! Take heart "Cool Mom" - the lady in the SUV was probably living a life like one of The "Desperate" Housewives of New Jersey - and YOU are soooo much cooler than them! Thanks for being real.

  2. wait, they leave you alone in the shower? i'm so jealous.

    great post.